A Song from John McCain For His Brother Joe

I’m sure many of you have heard about John McCain’s brother Joe’s verbal scuffle with a 9-1-1 operator while stuck in northern Virginia traffic. It got me to thinking about what song John McCain might be inspired to sing on the subject so I put together this little ditty.

To be sung to the tune of “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother” by Bobby Scott and Bob Russell, most famously performed by The Hollies.

The road is long with many a winding turn.
The taffic’s jammed up from here to who knows where.
But for Joe, this is an emergency.
He’s an asshole. He’s my brother.

See Joe is stuck in “commie Virginia“.
He’s got to get where folks cheer guns and prayer.
Joe McCain is a REAL American.
He’s an asshole. He’s my brother.

The cars won’t move, so Joe dials 9-1-1.
You think this is fair? Tell Joe. He don’t hear.
“Time is money and I’ve got special places to go.”
He’s an asshole. He’s my brother.

The operator asks Joe to get off the line.
“They’re people out there who really need care”
So Joe hangs up, but not without a rude “f&*k you.”
He’s an asshole. He’s my brother.

The race was long. I don’t stand a chance to win.
My brother the creep, just wants to bang my veep.
But the fruit don’t fall very far from the tree.
He’s an asshole. He’s just like me.

He’s an asshole. He’s my brother.

Respectfully (?),

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