Notes from the Fringe
What is it about 2010 that each political headline seems wackier than the previous one? Here are some random thoughts on some random wackiness.
Gay is Disgusting but it Pays the Rent
Carl Paladino, Republican candidate for New York State Governor, has a major problem with gays. In fact, he thinks taking your kid to a Gay Pride Parade is one of the worst things you can do — letting your kids see those queers bumping and grinding. After Carl expressed his disgust in public, he then issued an apology to the gay community. Could it have anything to do with his owning properties that house gay bars? Well I have to be honest here. I find Carl and his antics a breath of fresh air. If we overlook this minor hypocrisy, Carl has so far called ‘em like he sees them, politics be damned. Pundits have remarked that this is a by-product of people new to politics not knowing what to say or when to keep their mouth shut. But seriously, how can you resist a guy who in this PC age, says he finds the gay lifestyle revolting, tells a reporter “I will take you out”, and then asks for your vote in the next breath? Plus, if you close your eyes and just listen to him, it sounds like Andy Sipowicz from “NYPD Blue” is running for office.
Speaking of Gays, We Can Give Thanks for the End of DADT to … The GOP?
That’s right folks, the plaintiffs in the court case that may have ended Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, were the Log Cabin Republicans. How lame can our Democratic run government with our Democratic President be that it took a group of Republicans (albeit gay ones) to put an end to DADT? Well this really should not surprise us too much. President Obama has never done a particularly good job of hiding his disdain for the gay community. Whether it is his refusal to recognize gay marriage or his refusal to use the power of his office to end the practice of DADT, it is abundantly clear that gays offend Obama’s Christian sensibilities. It doesn’t win him any points with the moral majority conservatives because being born in Kenya trumps being a fellow homophobe in their book.
Christine O’Donnell Should be Running Against Alvin Greene
It is plain as day that neither Republican Senate candidate Christine O’Donnell nor Democratic Senate candidate Alvin Greene are in a fair fight. O’Donnell, with witchcraft in her past is being slaughtered in the polls by her challenger Chris Coons. No one has yet figured out how Greene won the Democratic primary in South Carolina much less how he could possibly beat Jim DeMint. However, the two are such priceless candidates that it would be much more fun to see them square off against each other.
On Lawrence “Crazy Larry” O’Donnell’s new MSNBC show, The Last Word, Alvin Greene got his opportunity to speak to the issues. No slick subterfuge from this man. To almost every question Lawrence asked him (like where he got the nickname Turtle), Greene replied “Jim DeMint caused the recession.” Never have I seen any politician so doggedly stay on his talking points. DeMint could learn a thing or two from his opponent. Maybe if Jim stayed on a narrow script, he wouldn’t say dumb-ass crap like gays and single women shouldn’t be school teachers.
Then there is my new sweetheart, Christine O’Donnell. For the past two years I have been criticizing Rich Lowry of The National Review for his entirely penis-based support of Sarah Palin. It took some time but when Christine O’Donnell gave me that sideways look while the pretty music played in the background and she said “I’m not a witch. I’m nothing you’ve heard. I’m you.”, well my readers, my heart went all aflutter. In the space of a few weeks, O’Donnell has made Palin yesterday’s news. She’s pretty without the snark. She’s chirpy without the nagging Palin voice. And most of all, she is truly media savvy. After more than a decade of appearing on TV (mostly on Bill Maher’s old show Politically Incorrect), O’Donnell knows how to make love to a camera. I watched a few minutes of her debate with Chris Coons this evening and I have to admit I liked her. Unlike Palin who is dumb and sounds dumb, O’Donnell might not know jack-sh*t but she sells it. When she couldn’t name a recent Supreme Court decision with which she disagreed, it came off as honest, not idiotic. And when Wolf Blitzer volunteered Roe v. Wade, she reminded him that it wasn’t a recent case. I almost want her to win just so I can continue lusting after her for six years. Then again, several insiders say she’s not in this to win it in the first place. She just wants that contract at Fox News. So, heck, I may get to watch her anyway. (Please keep this between just you and me … I don’t want my wife to find out!)
If Only He Had Been a Confederate Soldier
Rich Iott, running for the House from Ohio made a splash with photos documenting his participation in a WWII reenactment “club” that he and his son bonded over. How could a little father-son bonding be a political football? Well it gets a bit tricky when Daddy plays a Nazi soldier in the reenactment and expresses admiration for WWII Germany as the little country that could. The other night, Chris Matthews used his MSNBC show Hardball to call out Iott and dismiss any comparison of WWII reenactors to Civil War reenactors. Sadly, that is where Chris missed the ball altogether. Civil War rebel soldiers are our Nazi’s, civil war era plantations are our concentration camps and blacks of the day are our Jews. You’d never know this by visiting the South. The last time I was in Atlanta the hotel TV advertised tours of plantations to give us a slice of Southern culture, with no mention of the degradation that went on there. I don’t know which is the greater American sin, the peculiar institution itself or our lack of true shame over our past. Perhaps we need to take a lesson from modern-day Germany which shows its remorse and, in fact, makes dressing up like a Nazi illegal. That’s serious regret. They don’t offer nostalgic tours of Buchenwald.